Not to mention that slang differs between regions – think about what you called the shoes you used for sports in primary school, either like the ones above or those black ones with the elastic in the front. If you asked me what they were called, I’d say daps. Ask someone from England, they’re plimsolls. Then go across the Atlantic and ask an American and they’ll say something different again!

Germany’s no different. Thankfully I haven’t encountered many problems in the way of difficult dialects, but I’ve heard tales from other year abroaders who’ve struggled with Schwäbisch (you’ll hear this in Baden-Würtennberg) or Bayerisch (Bavaria).

For example:  order a Bratwurst here in Dortmund and you’re wanting a ‘Bratwurst mit Brötchen’ – head to Bavaria and you’re wanting a ‘Bratwurst mit Semmel’ . Ever heard the story about how John F Kennedy once called himself a doughnut when giving a speech in West Berlin? It’s a long- standing urban myth that the oft quoted ‘Ich bin ein Berliner’ actually means ‘I am a doughnut’ because of a grammatical error. Perhaps in Nordrhein-Westfalen, but not so in Berlin, where Berliners are called Pfannkuchen. The differences are even more noticeable when you compare Austrian German with Germany’s German. Heuer instead of dieses Jahr (this year), Grüß Gott instead of Guten Tag… it’s enough to make your head spin!

These kinds of linguistic differences with regards to slang are what make studying a language both difficult and interesting at the same time. Language is constantly changing, you’re never going to be aware of all the colloquialisms of your own language, let alone those from other languages!

I bet you all thought Insert Title Here was actually the real title eh??

So this blog will be called Can’t Say Strawberry from now on, not that the URL or anything changes as a consequence, but if any of you (three) readers have me bookmarked, then the title needs to be changed!

As for the reason… well.

Being thrust into a world run by a completely different language has many different challenges, from grammar and vocabulary to just not being able to understand what the hell everyone around you is on about. Lots of ‘pardons?’ (or ‘bitte?’ in my case, but I seem to just utter a dumbfounded ‘’schuldigung?’ every time) and patience are required.

But then there’s that accent problem, you know, that thing that completely gives away your un-nativeness, your status as foreigner trying desperately to master the lingo, bumbling through your ‘ich bins’, ‘ich wills’ and ‘darf ich auf der Toilette gehen bittes’ to get to some sort of conclusion. Pronunciation gives a lot away! I’ve never had a problem with the ‘ch’ sound, being fluent in Welsh, but that’s only half of it. I find that speaking German often makes me thirsty from the effort of trying to sound as German as possible. So far I have been mistaken as Dutch, so I’ll take that one as a compliment!

Despite this effort, I still can’t bloody say Erdbeere – or strawberry to us English native speakers. See the problem becomes apparent every time I order a crepe from the crepe stand at Dortmund Hauptbahnhof – ‘einmal Crepe mit Erdbeere bitte’ I say, but try as I might, I can never escape the look of confusion and the ‘bitte?’ or ‘mit was?’ that follows. People have suggested that maybe I go for the easier to pronounce Nutella Crepe, but NO, I want my Erdbeere Crepe bitte!!

I thought it would make a good title anyway because this blog was begun in order to document my year abroad, and it’s a fairly interesting title if I ever wanted to open a shop or something like that!

For those who want to know, this is how Erdbeere is meant to sound – but when I say it, it sort of comes out more as ‘ARDDBAAAAAAAR’ (why I’ve been cutting off the –eh bit at the end I don’t know) So, any readers out there with pronunciation troubles like me? Perhaps you’re on a year abroad too and are all too familiar with the confused look from locals? I’d love to hear your stories!

A while back, another sewing blogger linked to Manequim’s collection of free patterns – really chic, really cute… one problem? They’re all in Portuguese! So I downloaded the pattern for this beauty : 

Now, for good old Google translate. I loved how back in Year 9, kids used to try and fool the foreign language teachers into thinking that they’d done awesome German/French/whathaveyou homework by writing it in English and then using google translate – except not only would Google translate use forms that they hadn’t even learn yet, it would use them incorrectly! Fun times to be had when marking that piece of work! I half want to give out homework just to see if anyone does it at my school, but it’s a Gymnasium, and they’re all clever enough and hard working enough to do it themselves! There goes my fun

But anyway, here’s what  google translate makes of the  instructions:

MOUNT
• Close the sides of the external and internal parts separately.
• Add the external and internal parts, right on right, with a seam by
edges of the armholes. Beat the seams of iron, turning the gaps on the inside parts
internal and secure with stitching different. Revire parts, inside on inside.
• Close the collar with a seam, holding the edges under, right on
right. Next, crease the collar along the length, leaving the
edges higher, right on right.
• Sew the edges of the larger collar, without closing the edges of the neckline assembly
front and back. Revire, inside on inside.
• Sew the right edge of the inside of the collar at the neckline of the right front
and back, matching the numbers mount.
• Put up the outside edge of the right of the neckline and secure with
different stitching.
• Put up the bottom edges (0.3 cm, approximately) for the reverse. Tap
iron. Put up the borders again and again secure with stitching.

Go on then! Get to it! BEAT THOSE SEAMS OF IRON DAMN YOU!